What's in a Name?

According to a Facebook study/poll, 1 out of 3 women in their twenties opt to keep their maiden name when they marry. I changed my maiden name when I got married, it was what married people do. I didn't give it a seconds thought.

Since then, I have regretted the decision. Maybe this is just one of the side effects of a poor life decision buuut--I think, even in another situation, the opinions that I am laying out in this post would be the same.

The main, most significant reason for keeping my maiden name is simply that it is my name. Kristen Jacobsen is the name that I have always have, the name I have accomplishments under, the name that people know me by, not to mention, it sounds nicer than Kristen Hogan does. When people ask, "Who are you?" I give my name. It is my identity.

Equality. Reason number two. Why should the women change her name to the man's name when they marry? Why doesn't the man change his? The woman is not the property of the husband, the woman is her own person. Her own name, her own friends, her own goals, her own life. A marriage is a partnership and two people working together as a team. The marriage is not two people working towards one person's goals. It is an equal partnership.

Identity and equality are my two main reasons for me wanting to change my name back to what it has always been.

As a disclosure, I have no problem with other women changing their name to their husband's name when they marry. Whether it is for romantic reasons, it is traditional, or the women just doesn't like her name and wants a change. It is all good. Maybe the couple decides to hyphenate their names together, take each others names as middle names, combine their names into one, or pick out an entirely new name for their new family unit. These are all perfectly good and reasonable reasons for a name change.

In my personal decision to change back to and keep my maiden name, the question comes up, what name will the kids have? Will they be John George Hername Hisname? John George Hername-Hisname? Hisname Hername? Hisname-Hername? Just his name? Just her name? A new name entirely? I have read about parents naming the girls after the mom and the boys after the dad, or switching back and forth between last names for every other kid. This poses the question, what happens when the parent with the different name tries to take the child on a plane, or sign them up for a new activity, or pick them up from daycare?

A person's name is their own personal decision. It must be made based on the person's situation, goals, status, and feelings. These are my thoughts on the matter.